Shopping weekend

I died and went to shopping heaven Saturday night. Anna and I went to the Christ the King Bazaar to finish our Christmas shopping. The slope was bad (gradual, but oddly difficult to traverse), and we kinda had a hard time keeping our balance walking up and down and up and down and up and down the two aisles but by far, I got the best deals ever. I basically busted MY ENTIRE SALARY on weekend shopping. I'll have to survive on Skyflakes for the next two weeks. Well, not exactly, but I can't splurge on dinner too much until the next suweldo. Hehe! Oh well. I have to lose weight anyway. I loooooooove everything I bought. This is the last of my shopping escapade extravaganzas, since I'll be belt-tightening beginning January next year. Read: saving up for a car, which is going to take quite a while, even if I get a hefty bonus... (Lord, please enlighten the minds of the partners of the firm and make them realize what a difference they will make in the lives of so many entrepreneurs if they give me a bonus... Hehehe!) So... My plan is to save half my net income (i.e. less taxes and other charges, rent and bills). The other half will comprise my monthly personal allowance. It's actually a pretty good plan. My "personal allowance" isn't too bad. So anyway,,, any shopping I'll be doing will be financed by my "personal allowance". The policy is N-E-V-E-R touch my savings unless I'm dying and/or in immediate need of surgery and/or expensive medication the cost of which cannot be reasonably borne by the disposable half of my income. (And yes, the reason I'm writing this is to psyche myself up.) So there. Three days and two rehearsals to making-a-fool-out-of-myself-day (a.k.a. the firm's Christmas party). Ladida...

It's the season to be not-so-jolly...

It's been a rough couple of days. And it has nothing to do with work. Well, save for the fact that we don't get any free cuts, or the right to say, "It's sleepy weather. I don't think I'll go to work today. I'll sleep this one in." I like my job and where I'm at. The past few days just haven't been very forgiving in terms of my psyche. I thought the week was going to turn out fine until semi-recent events sent me spiralling down into another downcycle. I won't elaborate. I don't really relish the thought of having to churn out actual words to describe how sucky it feels to not be so in tune with the so-called spirit of Christmas. And speaking of Christmas, I think the dreaded holidays are taking their toll again. The most obvious pop-up would be that I, together with dozens of other new hires from here and other firms, will be making a complete and utter fool out of myself dancing to the beat of songs I don't even listen to, all for the sadistic amusement of the powers that be. Give me physical pain any day of the week and I'll pay you for it. It doesn't make it any better that I actually have to organize the goddamned thing. But no, that isn't what toed the line. For one thing, I miss studenthood. I miss the so-called life I used to have, and the people I used to drag and get dragged by. I don't miss financial dependence, but I do miss being carefree, and being responsible only for myself.

On a different but not too distant note, my train of thought lately has been running in the direction of figuring out where I'm spending the two four-day weekends later this month. As most of my friends probably already know, Lipa is not a very good place to spend the holidays. I just want to see my dad and my brother, but I will not (Read: WILL NOT) spend a night there. I don't have very good emotional ties with the city or with the people there, particularly someone I will not mention but people already know. Not too many happy memories to be had. Personally, my default holiday hideout is my grandmother's, although it hasn't been very festive there since my uncles left for Houston. I want to be proven wrong though, for the sake of my nephews, who are now old enough to appreciate the difference between an actual celebration and one where we just sit silently around the dinner table. The option of spending the holidays in Baguio at my aunt's place, but I'm not sure if she'll be staying home or going to my cousin's place in Gumaca. In any case, anywhere I spend the holidays, the people I end up NOT spending the holidays with won't exactly be pleased with me. Which doesn't really leave any room for what I want. Ate Tina (my cousin) told me she would just kidnap me come the holidays so it wouldn't be my fault, and that she would take the fall for me, but, well, I don't know. It's one of those seasons when all choices presented to me are wrong for at least one relevant party. The complications of having equally dearly beloved family members, most of whom are the fiercely jealous types, spread all over the country...

More work just poured in after my two-hour respite from the world... I'm not complaining. I'm not whining. I'm a bit too numbed out at the moment for that. Just a statement of fact. The pains of being an adult and having to take responsibility for my decisions knowing that however I decide, I'm bound to run into a brick wall and break a few bones in the process. Thus the title.

Ohmigod I can't believe I'm so F-ING pissed.

The problem with this creature is that she thinks she can deliver offensive remarks with impunity because she expects people to take it as "so her". It's so annoying that it bothers me but man, it's been bugging me since yesterday and I want to rant, so to hell with everything else. I wouldn' t be writing about this if I weren't so F-ing pissed. Arggh. Word of advice, things said in confidence, are, as the word suggests, confidential, i.e. should not be blurted out in an attempt at being candid or half-cute. Duh?!! I sooooo hate that thing right now. Some people should really spend like an extra hour before even considering using their vocal chords. Note to self: smalltalk, period. And then dunk dog slobber on her head. Let her see if she finds it cute. What a hypo.